I don't know what else to call it...but I definitely have it. I hit people. It's just a normal part of interactive conversation for me, the way nodding while talking might be normal for others. I hit to say, "Hey you!" or "Are you kidding me?" or "What the crap?" or "Shut up!" or "Whatever!" or "That's what I was thinking!" and stuff like that. Most people just say those things I suppose, but I'm trying to be more "appropriate" and show some restraint during these days of maturity which I find myself in. Maybe my body does it as a reflex. Like when I hesitate verbally as an act of self control, my body has to rid it's system of the desire to say such things, so I hit the person. I don't know which is better.
I do it without thinking and sometimes I don't even know I've hit someone until I'm told that I've done so. For example, apparently I hit Judy Slaughter or maybe I grabbed her, I can't remember. What I do remember is that she was saying how wives needed to get up in the morning with their husbands. When they get up. However early that may be. I can still see her gesturing with her hands to rise, saying "Get up, get up!" Also, there was something about baking muffins for them at that hour as well...I really don't know when the hitting started, but a witness confirmed that I had done so. What sort of thoughts could I have been repressing that forced my body to physically express them? I just can't imagine.
Another example took place when I went to dinner with a friend last night. Let's make her very mysterious, this "friend" of mine. She shall remain nameless-no, I'll change her name to protect the innocent-Roberta, oooh and she's faceless! That's right I just took creative liberty and erased her face! But forget about Roberta, in this story, she's secondary at best. What? Back to my story. We were sitting in a booth when our server came over to take our drink order. "I know her." I said to Roberta after she walked away. I knew she recognized me from the way she looked at my face, but neither of us made gave any indication to the other that we wished to place the other's face. You know what I mean? Anyway, I'll make a not so long story, even shorter here. Mid way through the meal I decided I needed to make personal contact. So when she came back to ask us "How is everything?" I replied, "Good. Hey do I know you? Do you know me?" She paused, smiled and asked, "I think so. Are you Bethany?" Bethany is my sister. "No." Smack. I whacked her arm. "Jessica!"
"Oh, okay. I wasn't sure. Well good to see you again." And then we mysteriously had a different server for the rest of the night. I don't know what that was about.
What do you think? Is the hitting syndrome a problem? Does anyone else out there suffer from this?
